New Birth. New Parents.
I just visited my cousin-in-law and so happy to see the new born child! It's really amazing to see how actually God can create lovely gifts for us! And to mix and match DNA from a father and mother. And have so much hair! Ha!
Last week I also heard of another of my friend's brother, who had twins from their same sex marriage. It will be their second and third child! I'm not sure whose sperm was used, but it's just so amazing that how we can pro-create babies directly and indirectly. That's a great news for them and the family. One thing for sure is that my friend's mum is very happy for his son!
Babies do bring a family closer as it actually takes everyone's love and actions to make it easier for new born parents. No one taught us to be parents. Come to think of it. We just learned about sexual organs in Secondary two and know that pre- martial sex is totally unacceptable in civic and moral lessons. And when we go Upper secondary school and tertiary education, there are not much (close to zero) education about love and parenting. It's mostly about academic and not a lot on relationship building and preparing for adulthood.
I find that we should have more awareness about what parenting and building relationships really are. And not much emphasis about wedding and marriage, which practically speaking is just a one or two day event. Parenting is actually a whole life skill that should be well planned, and who is taking the role of it.
Marriage is just a one day event and I don't feel one should spend their life savings on it. I have seen cases whereby people surrender their life policies and endowment plans just to fork the marriage event. Is it worth it? It is not a day of impressing people, showing people how good they look in photographs and the uniform proceeding of the wedding dinner. It's just not what I deem practical.
I just feel one's marriage life should emphasize on parenthood more. I do not know how to put it, but I have seen that most of the times, once a child is born, it should be parenthood, not just motherhood or grandparenthood (if there is such word exist). Both father and mother should take equal responsibility to take care of the child. There should be a flow as to what is the point of a marriage. To marry and get a house only, I think the couple should probably rethink about the marriage vow. It is so short term and honestly, a couple should talk about their life plan before being wedded or even applying for BTO. Budgeting is very important too! Talk things openly.
For example, we made a simple long term planning in 2008 and somewhat things are quite in place for us.
2008- Buy a house.
2009- Have a baby. Save $x.
2010- Down into our house. Save $x.
2011- Have a baby. Save $x.
2012- Down into our house. Save $x.
2013- Have a baby. Save $x.
2014- Upgrade to a 5 room. Save $x.
2015- Have a baby. Save $x.
Have a simple joint goal for a couple. I didn't write how much my savings because it's secret. However, you can do it too! Then I believe in the marriage, there will be much more joy and meaning to it! Love definitely drives to achieve the goal. Car is not an issue for us because we feel that we have bigger goals and don't deem pumping $2k a month for easy transport is wise in an early marriage life.
I am really glad that most of my guy friends play a big role in taking care of their new borns! The trend is increasing and I'm really very glad about it. I really hope that there will be more importance placed in fatherhood parenting in the future and makes the new birth even more wholesome! In May onwards, there will be a fatherhood one week paternity leave for all new fathers! It's not a lot, but it is a good first step for our economy. I hope it may increase the period as a father's role really helps the new mother in terms of emotional support as well as a fatherly figure for the child.
Last week I also heard of another of my friend's brother, who had twins from their same sex marriage. It will be their second and third child! I'm not sure whose sperm was used, but it's just so amazing that how we can pro-create babies directly and indirectly. That's a great news for them and the family. One thing for sure is that my friend's mum is very happy for his son!
Babies do bring a family closer as it actually takes everyone's love and actions to make it easier for new born parents. No one taught us to be parents. Come to think of it. We just learned about sexual organs in Secondary two and know that pre- martial sex is totally unacceptable in civic and moral lessons. And when we go Upper secondary school and tertiary education, there are not much (close to zero) education about love and parenting. It's mostly about academic and not a lot on relationship building and preparing for adulthood.
I find that we should have more awareness about what parenting and building relationships really are. And not much emphasis about wedding and marriage, which practically speaking is just a one or two day event. Parenting is actually a whole life skill that should be well planned, and who is taking the role of it.
Marriage is just a one day event and I don't feel one should spend their life savings on it. I have seen cases whereby people surrender their life policies and endowment plans just to fork the marriage event. Is it worth it? It is not a day of impressing people, showing people how good they look in photographs and the uniform proceeding of the wedding dinner. It's just not what I deem practical.
I just feel one's marriage life should emphasize on parenthood more. I do not know how to put it, but I have seen that most of the times, once a child is born, it should be parenthood, not just motherhood or grandparenthood (if there is such word exist). Both father and mother should take equal responsibility to take care of the child. There should be a flow as to what is the point of a marriage. To marry and get a house only, I think the couple should probably rethink about the marriage vow. It is so short term and honestly, a couple should talk about their life plan before being wedded or even applying for BTO. Budgeting is very important too! Talk things openly.
For example, we made a simple long term planning in 2008 and somewhat things are quite in place for us.
2008- Buy a house.
2009- Have a baby. Save $x.
2010- Down into our house. Save $x.
2011- Have a baby. Save $x.
2012- Down into our house. Save $x.
2013- Have a baby. Save $x.
2014- Upgrade to a 5 room. Save $x.
2015- Have a baby. Save $x.
Have a simple joint goal for a couple. I didn't write how much my savings because it's secret. However, you can do it too! Then I believe in the marriage, there will be much more joy and meaning to it! Love definitely drives to achieve the goal. Car is not an issue for us because we feel that we have bigger goals and don't deem pumping $2k a month for easy transport is wise in an early marriage life.
I am really glad that most of my guy friends play a big role in taking care of their new borns! The trend is increasing and I'm really very glad about it. I really hope that there will be more importance placed in fatherhood parenting in the future and makes the new birth even more wholesome! In May onwards, there will be a fatherhood one week paternity leave for all new fathers! It's not a lot, but it is a good first step for our economy. I hope it may increase the period as a father's role really helps the new mother in terms of emotional support as well as a fatherly figure for the child.
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| Josh has a recent craze for train building! And he will want different curves and tunnels all the time! |
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| Kate loves to eat by herself and doesn't want us to help her. She loves to eat with Steady (dog) and occassionally gives him food as she accidentally drops on the floor. Kind of the food chain theory. |
